Amanda’s Story

Struggling with hardships such as abuse, stigma and discrimination, homelessness, or traumatic memories can be difficult. But life can get better. Connecting with the right people, finding inner strength and tapping into local programs can make all the difference. Visit Up2SD.org to view personal story movies created by San Diegans to inspire, offer hope and challenge stereotypes.

“The day before our first wedding anniversary my husband ended his life. My life was shattered. My son was what kept me going; being a mother kept me alive. But I suffered from a deep depression and spent many years struggling to provide the very best I could for my son.

By the time my son turned 20 I had been depressed, sad and angry for a long time. Feeling resentful and lonely with feelings of abandonment, I was starting to lose hope for life and it was a struggle to live. I had thought about ending my life for a long time but this time I made a plan to do it. But I had made a promise to a counselor that I would let him know if I wanted to end my life. I had already taken the pills but I remembered this promise and I called him and he connected me to help.

Unfortunately I continued to be in denial and didn’t trust psychiatric help offered to me. I had a nervous breakdown, ended up losing my job and eventually became homeless. And that is when I called the San Diego County Access and Crisis Line and really accepted that I needed help and that I couldn’t do it alone. With the incredible mental health services I received from the County of San Diego I got better, and to this day I continue to work on my recovery on a daily basis. I am now dedicated to helping others. If I had not gone through any of these experiences, I couldn’t share this with others who are hopeless, and to share that there is hope and help.” –Amanda

For information about suicide prevention and local resources, visit: Up2SD.org